“Hey, how’s it going. I’m

“Hey, how’s it going. I’m Mark.”

“I know who you are.”

…

My friend Rosco is one of the most even-keeled people I know. I went to his wedding in Cape Cod a couple months ago. The ceremony was gorgeous and afterwards I sat down at Table 7 looking forward to some tasty grub. I psyched myself up to be a big kid and introduced myself to the cute girl sitting next to me. To my surprise, she seemed to think we had met before.

“We’ve met before?”

“Yeah, I bought you a shot on your 21st birthday.”

…

My friend Rosco is one of the most even-keeled people I know. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have a sense of humor. Turns out that oh so interesting night filled with too many drinks with Rosco and others, intimate moments with the urinal at Crossroads, and words said to my ex that I should’ve kept to myself, also included a shot from this girl now sitting next to me—Rosco’s cousin. Nice work on the seating chart bud.

Raging embarassment aside we talked a bit more and I found out she works for an advertising company. Her company is small but it worked on one of my favorite commercials ever—the 60 second inital spot for Merrill Lynch’s Total Merrill program. Have you seen it? The one with the bull sitting in the living room and people yapping about something or other? Turns out the bull’s name was Dollar. And he was picked because he was physically very…ur…masculine. And not only was he well-endowed, but he would also get a little jittery during the shoots. A jittery bull in close quarters in never good, so they’d chill him out. By bringing in his lady friend. He’d do his business, calm down, and they’d get back to shooting. And most bulls I know don’t know the difference between a persian rug and a patch of grass, so whenever he needed to he’d just relieve himself. I used to think I’d like to make commercials…